


That Fish

by glassclosetcastiel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Existentialism, Hopeful Ending, M/M, POV Castiel, Sad, Tears, all of the tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-06
Updated: 2014-10-06
Packaged: 2018-02-20 03:25:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2413220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glassclosetcastiel/pseuds/glassclosetcastiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I have lived for aeons and will live on for aeons more.<br/>I live on for those few, precious moments:<br/>the moments I missed, perhaps, the first time around, but will not miss again.<br/>Those moments of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Fish

Time and space- they are one.  
The universe is a complexity beyond understanding- an infinity and a singularity.  
I see the entirety of time laid out before me- an ouroboros-  
a serpent forever devouring its own tail.

This existence burst forth and expanded, rapidly,  
until it collapsed in upon itself,  
only to burst forth again-  
a phoenix rising from its own ashes.

I have lived for aeons and will live on for aeons more.  
I live on for those few, precious moments:  
the moments I missed, perhaps, the first time around, but will not miss again.  
Those moments of him.

I live for the moment, at the sea, when my brother stopped my foot,  
saying, _don't step on That Fish, Castiel._  
Big plans for That Fish.  
He was That Fish. That Fish would be him.

I live for the moment his mother would sit,  
cradling her belly in her hands, whispering to her unborn son  
that I would watch over him.  
Watch over him I would.

I live for the moment when  
he was thrust out into the world,  
screaming and kicking.  
A Fighter from the start.

I live for the moment when  
he was Reborn,  
this time by my hand.  
The moment that we were bonded.

I live for those moments when I would learn,  
understand, know things about him.  
How a Real Smile touched his whole face.  
A crinkle of his eye. A laugh deep in his belly.

I live for That Moment: the Last Moment.  
I took his weary face in my hands, and whispered,  
_it's time. You're free. I'll see you soon._  
And because this existence would burst forth again,  
a phoenix rising from its own ashes,  
it was true.

I will see you soon, Dean.

**Author's Note:**

> I dont know why I did this. I'm mad at myself.  
> And I'm sobbing. So. I'm sorry.


End file.
